If you think your child might be falling behind, here’s a step-by-step guide for you...
First thing is to check what you actually mean by ‘falling behind’. It’s pretty obvious that not all children will learn and develop at the same rate; that some will find schoolwork harder than others will; and that each individual pupil – like each individual adult – will have their own particular set of strengths and weaknesses in different areas of the curriculum. So we have to be clear that the term ‘falling behind’ is about your child’s own progress, not measured by the progress of other children, but measured by what is agreed to be their potential rate of progress.
Second thing to do is to try to identify exactly where that progress is lagging behind. Is it across the whole curriculum? Extremely unlikely. Or is it especially in one or two areas? Can you identify these? And if so, how fundamental do these areas seem to be in relation to the rest of their work? For example, if they are still having problems writing coherent sentences in well-organised paragraphs by the time they’re in Year 6, this would be a fundamental weakness to be carrying forward into secondary school, where the written assignments set in many subject areas will be based upon precisely these skills.
Third thing to do is to arrange to see your child’s form teacher/tutor (this applies to both primary and secondary schools) especially if the routine Parents Evening for your child is not in the very near future. Spell out your anxieties clearly, concentrate on what you feel are the main issues, and see how the teacher responds. Remember that if the difficulties are being experienced in a particular subject area in a secondary school, you would be well advised to explain the issues to the form tutor in advance, so that they can consult the subject teacher before you meet, rather than lose time by listening to you at the meeting but then being unable to respond because they have inadequate information.
In fact, (a) you might discover that there are related issues in some other subject areas anyway; and (
the subject teacher might opt to be involved in the meeting as well as, or even instead of, the form tutor. Who you get to see will depend to some extent upon the system used in the school for dealing with parents’ queries or complaints.
Most schools these days use some form of individualised, personalised learning system, coupled with pupil-tracking systems, which will help the staff to respond to your queries and worries from the basis of factual knowledge. So at the conclusion of the conversation you should know whether or not you were justified in being worried. You should be given a clear statement of the levels being achieved by your child, of what can be expected of him/her at this stage, and of what the school are doing to move him/her towards those targets.
Fourth thing to do then is to ask the teacher what you might be able to do with your child at home to provide the necessary support to enable them to progress at the rate of which they are deemed capable. One very simple measure, if your child is set regular homework, is for you to make sure that these are being done promptly, handed in punctually, and carried out conscientiously. Some schools have systems by which you can find out what homework your child has on any given night – on their website, or via a homework information hotline. Without making it into a confrontation, if this can be avoided, you need to ensure that your child is completing all tasks set. The mere fact that you are showing this degree of interest will act as a strong motivator for them anyway. The link between school and home will be reinforced – your child will no longer see them as two entirely separate sectors of their life, but as two linking dimensions of it.
Once you’ve spoken with the teacher(s), assuming that they confirm that your child needs to be pushed a little more, and offered guidance and support to help them achieve better levels, you should discuss a joint strategy with the school. Will there be some extra communications from them about homeworks set, classwork covered, and issues arising? What response are they looking for from you? Be prepared to discuss what you feel you are able to contribute to the joint working of the strategy.
Finally, it's only human if you experience some lingering worries about this joint home-school approach, mostly based upon such notions as ‘I don’t know anything about this subject’ or ‘I was never any good at that’ or ‘things have changed a lot since I was at school’!
Actually it sometimes helps rather than hinders if you can empathise with your child’s difficulties in a subject. It might, for example, help you to show them how to think carefully through the information in a history assignment to sort out which facts are useable as evidence for the task set, and which are irrelevant: you can help them to work through this step by step, showing how you tackle a problem as an adult, rather than panicking about it and doing nothing.
Furthermore, there are other ways to help a subject come alive for them. For example, is science baffling? Why not get them to join the after-school Science Club? That’s a fun way to learn about scientific method, as they have a new ‘crime’ to solve using scientific evidence every two weeks... You get the idea.
And, if there isn’t a club, why don’t you see if you can help start one up? Again, the fact that you’re taking such an active interest will be a good motivator for your child.
Another thing, getting your child to read out what they’ve written, or simply making sure you’ve read it through before it gets handed in, can reveal basic errors which don’t require any subject expertise on your part. Nobody expects you to become the world’s leading nuclear scientist or mediaeval historian overnight; but a supportive (not oppressively demanding!) adult, wanting to find out what’s going on in lessons, what the work is that’s been set, how it’s been approached, what the outcome is… that’s being a good parent. And it’ll make the world of difference
